Two or three days ago we were at an orphanage just lovin’ on some kids. There was one girl in particular, Jenifer, who never said a word but just wanted to be held. I was sitting on these tiny, wooden chairs, squished between two tables, and this girl would not leave my lap for anything. I tried to get her to smile, but she wouldn’t. Finally, I just started praying that she would just fall asleep. God kept giving me images of girls who have been raped and sexually abused, and I knew there was a really good possibility this 7 year old had experienced that. So I prayed that she would fall asleep in the arms of Jesus, knowing that she was safe, loved, cared for, by a Heavenly Father who would never hurt her. And she fell alseep. I layed down across 4 wooden chairs, still squished between the tables, so incredibly uncomfortable. But she was asleep. I wasn’t going to move. In fact, I couldn’t move. I was stuck. I tried to get up several times but I couldn’t. So there I was, with a child sleeping on top of me experiencing the love of Jesus. And then my back started to cramp up. It had been like an hour and a half when the cramping started. I couldn’t move for the life of me, and there was no way I was going to wake this child up. She was having a love encounter with God. All my team mates were busy with other kids, so I was stuck. But then God told me that this is what his love is like. He loves us when it hurts Him. He loves us when it is SO inconvenient for him, when we give him no response or reaction to follow Him, he persues us relentlessly.
God’s love makes no sense to me. It’s crazy. I can’t even believe it except for the fact that I experience it every single day. God, you blow my mind.
When it was finally time to go, I asked Cole to peel the child off of me. She woke up, got off of me, and then she walked over to a railing and stood there, arms crossed. She wouldn’t look at me, hug me. Nothing, she wouldn’t give me any response. But over and over God told me she needed that, she needed to be held. She needed that love. I love that little girl. God loves that little girl.
How much more so I want to pursue Christ because of how much He pursues me.
