Today, while family an friends are celebrating our freedom as a nation, I am receiving freedom from the Lord thousands of miles away from home. Today the Lord healed me and showed me how strong He is in my weakness. The past month I have dealt with an agonizing abscess in my mouth from a much needed root canal. As we traveled from Uganda to Kenya, the infection only continued to get worse. Last Friday I threw my hands up- I was broken, confused and could not understand why the Lord brought me to east Africa, just to bring me to my weakest point. That night I was done. I was over Uganda, Kenya and Africa as a whole. I told the Lord I was finished, that if He wanted me here, He would heal me. I didn’t sleep much that night, but when I woke the Lord made Himself very clear, “You are finally broken, you feel abandoned, and you are fully reliant on me.” That morning Job 30:18-19 spoke so much life into me, “In His great power God becomes like clothing to me; He binds me like the neck of my garment. He throws me into the mud, and I am reduced to ashes”. As I gathered myself and wiped away the tears, I realize two things. First, the Lord showed me that brokenness would be a reoccurring theme, not just this trip, but for the rest of my walk with Him. And most importantly, He has proven to be a faithful God and a healer.
This morning I woke early to go to the dentist. As I sat, waiting for what ended up being a full root canal, I’ll admit, I was worried. I began thinking of all the factors against me-a foreign doctor, performing surgery in a third world country, with old tools running on a generator. Just as soon as the thoughts flooded in, the Lord reminded me, my faith is not put in far off doctors using sketchy tools, rather, my faith rests in the Lord.
“Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.” Psalm 63:7-8
