Every night we prepare our hearts for bed by singing an
African hymn that starts off, “We thank you, Lord we thank you.” I stand most
nights with my arms open, wondering what in the world to be thankful for. Immediately
my mind goes to the dreadful experiences here in Mbarara, Uganda: A rash that
continually spreads down my arms, mosquito bites that cover my body (including
one in the middle of my forehead), and an unbearable toothache that would have
been fixed a week ago in the States. In the midst of my complaints, the Lord
waits patiently on me. He then begins to remind me that this trip was never meant
for my comfort or pleasure, and He reminds me of the many ways He has been
refining me. Never before have I been so physically sick and so terribly home
sick. Never before have I wanted the luxury of nice doctor’s offices, running
water and toilets, and my skin to turn back to its natural color, rather than
stained by the African dirt. But most importantly, never have I wanted so badly
to stay in this moment for the rest of my life. What I didn’t realize during my
time of “thanking” Him is something only a humble Father could teach His
daughter. It’s in these times of breaking down the flesh and refining the
Spirit within me that God works most deeply, and it’s in these times that He
has His way like never before.
“I was pushed back and about to fall, but the Lord helped
me. The Lord is my strength and my defense; He has become my salvation” Psalm
119: 13-14
