I’ve finally found where I belong

It’s not about where you are, or what you’re doing. It’s not about whom you’re with, or what you see in front of you; a sunrise or a blank page. It’s about his love. It’s about being completely wrapped up in his love. It’s about being delighted in and marveled at. It’s about being forgiven and adored. It’s about being in the presence of a Father who sets you free, and looks at you with love and says “Darling, my beautiful one, arise and come away with me.” And that’s when you take his hand and put so much trust in him that you free fall into whatever he has planned. With no doubt.

Yeah, I’ve finally found where I belong. It’s not in Kenya, Uganda, or even America. It’s in the presence of God. I have never felt more alive and free than the moments when I am completely consumed by his grace and endless love. Watching the sunrise with my team on our last day of ministry I could feel the presence of God revealing himself. Those are gifts the world cannot give. My flesh had almost taken over making my bed seem more comforting than my God, but oh what I would have missed.

I would have missed this moment of peace, this moment where I heard God speak so clearly. I don’t want to miss these moments. Although I know there is no way Jesus could love me any more or any less, I still want to please him. He has convicted me of the things I do that may not be deemed “wrong” due to the world’s standards, but I have discovered they in no way further the kingdom. I have to stop trying to look or be a certain way, because it is impossible to be inauthentic when you focus on being in his presence. “For you were once children of darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light and find what pleases the Lord.” 1Thessalonians 5:5

Seeing the light of the sunrise on that morning I was reminded that we are literally in the light of God, and it covers us. DO NOT HESITATE, he told me. Do not be afraid to take a risk in him because you will be blessed, and how true that has been thus far. I am no better than anyone else for having come to Africa; I have only been transformed by allowing him to love me. So let him love you whether it is with a sunrise or through the heart of someone else. It’s hard to love someone when they reject you or don’t fully love you back, but Jesus never stops loving. How crazy it is to be the child of a God who will never give up on us! And we can brighten up the world by reflecting who he is. “Go now and leave your life of sin; whoever walks in the light of the Lord will never live in darkness.”

I’ve realized after returning home I will begin to feel homesick for Africa, but that homesick feeling is something that has come and gone for years, because I have discovered I don’t belong here. This world will never be able to offer us what we truly desire. We are homesick for the Kingdom come. So it’s okay to feel as if you don’t fit in, because you don’t. We are not of this world, we were meant for so much more. So Although I have loved every moment of this journey, and I have definitely left a little piece of my heart in Africa, this place isn’t what makes me come alive.

The people are Christ-like, the land is full of endless beauty, and the culture is simple, but that’s not what sets my heart on fire. I’m on fire when He’s near me. I’m on fire when he speaks. So I can be content knowing that wherever I am, whether that is Africa or America, in His presence, I’m home. And he might have taken me halfway across the world to show me just that.  So our trip may have come to a close, but the journey has just begun.

Love from Africa… for the last time. We’re coming home ya’ll!